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[title] => Vlasnici kafića ne mogu kuhati kave, ali mogu tražiti potpore od države, i to zajedno s - astrolozima. Evo na koje se djelatnosti odnose mjere HZZ-a
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Hrvatska je zemlja u kojoj epidemiološke mjere znače da maleni kafić koji je registriran za prodaju kave za ponijeti ili to go, što znači objekt u koji se uđe, naruči i plati kava s kojom se onda izlazi i pije gdje god to želite, ne smije raditi i kuhati kave. Kave za ponijeti kuhati i prodavati ne smiju ni kafići.
No, takve kave smiju se prodavati na automatima na trafikama, bolnicama, trgovinama, benzinskim stanicama, ukratko, svugdje gdje su postavljeni automati za kave. Smiju je prodavati i restorani. Znači, da bi kavu za ponijeti mogli prodavati, važno je da vam kava nije, štono bi rekli u poslovnom svijetu, core biznis ili još jednostavnije, kavu ne smiju prodavati oni kojima je kuhanje kave osnovna djelatnost. Drugi mogu.
Istovremeno, vlasnici kafića mogu s astrolozima, majstorima za tetovaže ili spiritistima, zatražiti mjere za očuvanje radnih mjesta, a mogu im se javiti zatreba li im neki stručni savjet ili pregled. Svi vi koji mislite da smo skrenuli s teme, ljuto se varate, Hrvatski zavod za zapošljavanje je objavio listu proširenih djelatnosti unutar ostalih osobnih uslužnih djelatnosti u kojoj su nabrojene djelatnosti na koje se mjere potpora odnose.
A to su: astrološke i spiritualističke djelatnosti, usluge pratnje i zakazivanja sastanaka, usluge ženidbenih ureda, usluge skrbi za kućne ljubimce, djelatnosti rodoslovnih organizacija, djelatnosti studija za izradu tetovaža i piercinga, usluge čistača cipela, nosača i čuvara parkiranih automobila, rad samoposlužnih automata na kovanice za fotografiranje, strojeva za vaganje, mjerenje krvnog tlaka, ormarića za čuvanje stvari...
Dakle, nije teško zamisliti scenarij u kojem se susreću vlasnik kafića, nosač, čistač cipela, trener pasa, tattoo majstor, astrolog i spiritist. Koji bi to roman bio da započnu razgovor o svojim doživljajima s posla. Svi rade nešto opipljivo, pa i astrolozi rade natalne karte, iz datuma i sata rođenja iščitavaju možebitne stvari, samo bi spiritualist zagonetno gledao u daljinu. Jer njihovo je područje druga dimenzija, ona u kojoj neki u zamračenim sobama prizivaju one s druge strane života, iz zagrobnog svijeta, dok neki iz branše u kontakt s onostranim stupaju uz pomoć kristala, tarota i tako pomažu onima koji im se obraćaju, nađe se to svega, pisanja zapisa, tjeranja zlih namjera, uroka i sto vragolija što se znaju isplesti oko života čovjeka. Tko ne zna o čemu se radi neka samo okrene kanale lokalnih televizija u sitne noćne sate.
Zove žena, a osoba s ekrana kaže da vidi kako joj je teško. Znači, mora biti spiritist jer vidi kilometrima daleko. Ispod, u dnu ekrana, piše koliko kuna košta poziv po minuti s mobitela, a koliko s fiksnog telefona...
Žena kaže da joj nije lako, ali ne zove zbog sebe, nego zbog sina.
Spiritist širi ruke i objašnjava: Znam, gospođo, ne prati ga sreća.
Žena uzdiše.
Spiritist nastavlja. Malo je boležljiv, malo je slab. Nema sreće u ljubavi.
Žena: Ne znam kad će se skućiti, nema posao. Ja sam već u godinama.
Spiritist klima s razumijevanjem: Gospođo, bit će bolje, vidim promjenu u drugoj polovici godine, dobit ćete vijest koja će promijeniti stvari.
I takvih je poziva svake večeri koliko vam duša želi. Spiritisti su ljudi na koje se slijeva hrpa problema. Kako često imaju posla s nečistim silama, katkad sve lijepo i po zakonu, imaju uz obrt za spiritualističke djelatnosti i obrt za čišćenje u kućama, a nekad se bave i ženidbenim posredovanjem, team bildingom. Znači, kad se nema pomoći s one strane, spremni su zasukati rukave.
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Hrvatska je zemlja u kojoj epidemiološke mjere znače da maleni kafić koji je registriran za prodaju kave za ponijeti ili to go, što znači objekt u koji se uđe, naruči i plati kava s kojom se onda izlazi i pije gdje god to želite, ne smije raditi i kuhati kave. Kave za ponijeti kuhati i prodavati ne smiju ni kafići.
No, takve kave smiju se prodavati na automatima na trafikama, bolnicama, trgovinama, benzinskim stanicama, ukratko, svugdje gdje su postavljeni automati za kave. Smiju je prodavati i restorani. Znači, da bi kavu za ponijeti mogli prodavati, važno je da vam kava nije, štono bi rekli u poslovnom svijetu, core biznis ili još jednostavnije, kavu ne smiju prodavati oni kojima je kuhanje kave osnovna djelatnost. Drugi mogu.
Istovremeno, vlasnici kafića mogu s astrolozima, majstorima za tetovaže ili spiritistima, zatražiti mjere za očuvanje radnih mjesta, a mogu im se javiti zatreba li im neki stručni savjet ili pregled. Svi vi koji mislite da smo skrenuli s teme, ljuto se varate, Hrvatski zavod za zapošljavanje je objavio listu proširenih djelatnosti unutar ostalih osobnih uslužnih djelatnosti u kojoj su nabrojene djelatnosti na koje se mjere potpora odnose.
A to su: astrološke i spiritualističke djelatnosti, usluge pratnje i zakazivanja sastanaka, usluge ženidbenih ureda, usluge skrbi za kućne ljubimce, djelatnosti rodoslovnih organizacija, djelatnosti studija za izradu tetovaža i piercinga, usluge čistača cipela, nosača i čuvara parkiranih automobila, rad samoposlužnih automata na kovanice za fotografiranje, strojeva za vaganje, mjerenje krvnog tlaka, ormarića za čuvanje stvari...
Dakle, nije teško zamisliti scenarij u kojem se susreću vlasnik kafića, nosač, čistač cipela, trener pasa, tattoo majstor, astrolog i spiritist. Koji bi to roman bio da započnu razgovor o svojim doživljajima s posla. Svi rade nešto opipljivo, pa i astrolozi rade natalne karte, iz datuma i sata rođenja iščitavaju možebitne stvari, samo bi spiritualist zagonetno gledao u daljinu. Jer njihovo je područje druga dimenzija, ona u kojoj neki u zamračenim sobama prizivaju one s druge strane života, iz zagrobnog svijeta, dok neki iz branše u kontakt s onostranim stupaju uz pomoć kristala, tarota i tako pomažu onima koji im se obraćaju, nađe se to svega, pisanja zapisa, tjeranja zlih namjera, uroka i sto vragolija što se znaju isplesti oko života čovjeka. Tko ne zna o čemu se radi neka samo okrene kanale lokalnih televizija u sitne noćne sate.
Zove žena, a osoba s ekrana kaže da vidi kako joj je teško. Znači, mora biti spiritist jer vidi kilometrima daleko. Ispod, u dnu ekrana, piše koliko kuna košta poziv po minuti s mobitela, a koliko s fiksnog telefona...
Žena kaže da joj nije lako, ali ne zove zbog sebe, nego zbog sina.
Spiritist širi ruke i objašnjava: Znam, gospođo, ne prati ga sreća.
Žena uzdiše.
Spiritist nastavlja. Malo je boležljiv, malo je slab. Nema sreće u ljubavi.
Žena: Ne znam kad će se skućiti, nema posao. Ja sam već u godinama.
Spiritist klima s razumijevanjem: Gospođo, bit će bolje, vidim promjenu u drugoj polovici godine, dobit ćete vijest koja će promijeniti stvari.
I takvih je poziva svake večeri koliko vam duša želi. Spiritisti su ljudi na koje se slijeva hrpa problema. Kako često imaju posla s nečistim silama, katkad sve lijepo i po zakonu, imaju uz obrt za spiritualističke djelatnosti i obrt za čišćenje u kućama, a nekad se bave i ženidbenim posredovanjem, team bildingom. Znači, kad se nema pomoći s one strane, spremni su zasukati rukave.
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17. svibanj 2024 04:59
