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Pred maškaranim pukom i meštrima ovogodišnjeg Krnjevala, Gangsterom i Natali-Tetom, večeras je optužen Krnjo Neplodni Virusni VAR-alica i osuđen na spaljivanje. Nije bio političar, a opet se svaki političar mogao u njemu prepoznati samo bi kažu trebalo napisati drugačije – Vara-lica, kazala je maškarana povorka.

- Pred svjedocima meštrima ovogodišnjeg Krnjevala, Gangsterom i Natali-Tetom koja u svom mandatu nije uspila zatrudniti da spasi natalitet u gradu i pred cilin splitskin maškaranim pukom svečano čitamo ovu Šentencu, optužnicu Krnji Neplodnome Virusnome VAR-alici.

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VAR-alice – prvo i najvažnije - gledali ste utakmice iz svoje masonske lože a niste platili članarinu Torcidi!

VAR-alice – ne stignete nadopuniti imovinske kartice koliko svakim danom zgrnete novih nekretnina

VAR-alice – ravnatelji učite djecu engleski da bi i oni mogli u Irsku i Ameriku ka i vi!

VAR-alice – napravili ste jednosmjerne ulice u luci da nam ljudi odlaze a ne mogu se vratiti doma!

VAR-alice – obećali ste nam kupanje na Žnjanu, zeleni Marjan, prometnu Kopilicu, pametni Dračevac, okrugle Rotore i čistu vodu, a od prošlog Krnjevala još se osim kazaljki na satu ništa nije maklo s mista! Do slijedećeg Krnjevala riješite barem ove dugove, nove ćemo oprostiti.

VAR-alice – nagurali ste turiste u svoje POS-ove stanove, a domaće izbacili!

VAR-alice – okrivili ste Vepra Špira i Podkurnjaka za propast Marjana, a oni ni krivi ni dužni!

VAR-alice – oteli ste nam Adventilaciju i odnijeli u Zagreb!

VAR-alice – vaši Žetončići su valuta koja ne vridi u Dalmaciji!

VAR-alice – sudite Krnji i Krnjevalu a u životu niste masku obukli

VAR-alice – KRIVI STE za pad nataliteta jer ste za vrime utakmica gledali porniće na VARu umjesto da pošteno sudite, ljubite i radite dicu! Kad bolje razmislimo - za vas je i bolje da se ne razmnožavate!

VAR-alice – KRIVI STE i što ste za porniće na VARu okrivili neki Kurona virus iako su jučer stigli rezultati iz Zagreba koji naravno kažu da je u Splitu sve negativno pa i nalazi na kurona virus! Split će upucat Kurona virus čim se pojavi!

Zbog svega nabrojenog, osudili su zaraženog Krnju VAR-alicu na spaljivanje!

Glavni program Splitskog krnjevala odvijao se u Čarobnoj šumi u Đardinu. Atmosferu je zagrijao Krešo Bengalka na oduševljenje mlađeg dijela publike koji je u dahu pjevao njegove hitove, a nakon njega za dobru atmosferu se pobrinuo Mladen Grdović koji je zaradio pljesak čim se popeo na binu. 

Stručni žiri od mnogobrojnih prijavljenih maski najboljom je izabrao masku Borovi koji su preživjeli pokolj na Marjanu koji su za originalnost nagrađeni s 1.000 kuna novčane nagrade. Nagradu od 200 kuna dobile su sljedeće maske: Kokošinjac (kokoš ili jaje), Slobodni zidari, Auto-cure, Obeliks i Kraljica zla. 

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Savjeti meštra Gangstera


Meštar Gangster, koji je preko 400 parova uspješno upoznao i usmjerio u brak, pročitao je svojih nekoliko savjeta, a evo što on savjetuju:

1. Malo laganja pomaže u upoznavanju. Nije poželjno da na početku veze budete previše iskreni, potrebno je kao na TV-u malo i reklame. Pa neće nitko se s tobom oženit ako mu odmah kažeš sve najgore o sebi. U ljubavi i politici poželjno je malo i slagati da bi te netko odabrao.

2. Tolerancija – nitko nije savršen i ljudi ostanu skupa jer toleriraju pogreške jedan drugoga a ne zato što su savršeni.

3. Upornost – U zavođenju ne uspjeva lijep nego uporan

4. Pozitivni i duhoviti budite uvijek nasmijani – osim ako nemate zube onda vam ne mogu pomoći.

5. Trudite se oko onoga tko vas hoće a ne gubiti vrijeme na neuzvraćenu ljubav

6. Plodite se i množite i to ne zato što sam ja rekao nego da nije tako ne bi ni nas bilo!

7. Nema varanja inače će stradati ka Krnje VAR-alica

8. Svima ćemo pomoći ali samo jednome nema pomoći: namrgođenoj ženi i škrtom muškarcu ili kako narod kaže: Nema ništa gore od tople pive ladne žene i škrtog muškarca!

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Pred maškaranim pukom i meštrima ovogodišnjeg Krnjevala, Gangsterom i Natali-Tetom, večeras je optužen Krnjo Neplodni Virusni VAR-alica i osuđen na spaljivanje. Nije bio političar, a opet se svaki političar mogao u njemu prepoznati samo bi kažu trebalo napisati drugačije – Vara-lica, kazala je maškarana povorka.

- Pred svjedocima meštrima ovogodišnjeg Krnjevala, Gangsterom i Natali-Tetom koja u svom mandatu nije uspila zatrudniti da spasi natalitet u gradu i pred cilin splitskin maškaranim pukom svečano čitamo ovu Šentencu, optužnicu Krnji Neplodnome Virusnome VAR-alici.

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VAR-alice – prvo i najvažnije - gledali ste utakmice iz svoje masonske lože a niste platili članarinu Torcidi!

VAR-alice – ne stignete nadopuniti imovinske kartice koliko svakim danom zgrnete novih nekretnina

VAR-alice – ravnatelji učite djecu engleski da bi i oni mogli u Irsku i Ameriku ka i vi!

VAR-alice – napravili ste jednosmjerne ulice u luci da nam ljudi odlaze a ne mogu se vratiti doma!

VAR-alice – obećali ste nam kupanje na Žnjanu, zeleni Marjan, prometnu Kopilicu, pametni Dračevac, okrugle Rotore i čistu vodu, a od prošlog Krnjevala još se osim kazaljki na satu ništa nije maklo s mista! Do slijedećeg Krnjevala riješite barem ove dugove, nove ćemo oprostiti.

VAR-alice – nagurali ste turiste u svoje POS-ove stanove, a domaće izbacili!

VAR-alice – okrivili ste Vepra Špira i Podkurnjaka za propast Marjana, a oni ni krivi ni dužni!

VAR-alice – oteli ste nam Adventilaciju i odnijeli u Zagreb!

VAR-alice – vaši Žetončići su valuta koja ne vridi u Dalmaciji!

VAR-alice – sudite Krnji i Krnjevalu a u životu niste masku obukli

VAR-alice – KRIVI STE za pad nataliteta jer ste za vrime utakmica gledali porniće na VARu umjesto da pošteno sudite, ljubite i radite dicu! Kad bolje razmislimo - za vas je i bolje da se ne razmnožavate!

VAR-alice – KRIVI STE i što ste za porniće na VARu okrivili neki Kurona virus iako su jučer stigli rezultati iz Zagreba koji naravno kažu da je u Splitu sve negativno pa i nalazi na kurona virus! Split će upucat Kurona virus čim se pojavi!

Zbog svega nabrojenog, osudili su zaraženog Krnju VAR-alicu na spaljivanje!

Glavni program Splitskog krnjevala odvijao se u Čarobnoj šumi u Đardinu. Atmosferu je zagrijao Krešo Bengalka na oduševljenje mlađeg dijela publike koji je u dahu pjevao njegove hitove, a nakon njega za dobru atmosferu se pobrinuo Mladen Grdović koji je zaradio pljesak čim se popeo na binu. 

Stručni žiri od mnogobrojnih prijavljenih maski najboljom je izabrao masku Borovi koji su preživjeli pokolj na Marjanu koji su za originalnost nagrađeni s 1.000 kuna novčane nagrade. Nagradu od 200 kuna dobile su sljedeće maske: Kokošinjac (kokoš ili jaje), Slobodni zidari, Auto-cure, Obeliks i Kraljica zla. 

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Savjeti meštra Gangstera


Meštar Gangster, koji je preko 400 parova uspješno upoznao i usmjerio u brak, pročitao je svojih nekoliko savjeta, a evo što on savjetuju:

1. Malo laganja pomaže u upoznavanju. Nije poželjno da na početku veze budete previše iskreni, potrebno je kao na TV-u malo i reklame. Pa neće nitko se s tobom oženit ako mu odmah kažeš sve najgore o sebi. U ljubavi i politici poželjno je malo i slagati da bi te netko odabrao.

2. Tolerancija – nitko nije savršen i ljudi ostanu skupa jer toleriraju pogreške jedan drugoga a ne zato što su savršeni.

3. Upornost – U zavođenju ne uspjeva lijep nego uporan

4. Pozitivni i duhoviti budite uvijek nasmijani – osim ako nemate zube onda vam ne mogu pomoći.

5. Trudite se oko onoga tko vas hoće a ne gubiti vrijeme na neuzvraćenu ljubav

6. Plodite se i množite i to ne zato što sam ja rekao nego da nije tako ne bi ni nas bilo!

7. Nema varanja inače će stradati ka Krnje VAR-alica

8. Svima ćemo pomoći ali samo jednome nema pomoći: namrgođenoj ženi i škrtom muškarcu ili kako narod kaže: Nema ništa gore od tople pive ladne žene i škrtog muškarca!

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Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Vladimir Dugandžić/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA
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Splitgdje su ljudi?

Izgorio Neplodni Virusni VAR-alica: Šentenca pročitana u gotovo komornoj atmosferi, splitski krnjeval definitivno pamti i bolje dane

Piše Ana Franić
26. veljače 2020. - 00:36
13053736
PREMIUM
Galerija
Paun Paunović/HANZA MEDIA

Pred maškaranim pukom i meštrima ovogodišnjeg Krnjevala, Gangsterom i Natali-Tetom, večeras je optužen Krnjo Neplodni Virusni VAR-alica i osuđen na spaljivanje. Nije bio političar, a opet se svaki političar mogao u njemu prepoznati samo bi kažu trebalo napisati drugačije – Vara-lica, kazala je maškarana povorka.

- Pred svjedocima meštrima ovogodišnjeg Krnjevala, Gangsterom i Natali-Tetom koja u svom mandatu nije uspila zatrudniti da spasi natalitet u gradu i pred cilin splitskin maškaranim pukom svečano čitamo ovu Šentencu, optužnicu Krnji Neplodnome Virusnome VAR-alici.

VAR-alice – prvo i najvažnije - gledali ste utakmice iz svoje masonske lože a niste platili članarinu Torcidi!

VAR-alice – ne stignete nadopuniti imovinske kartice koliko svakim danom zgrnete novih...

#SPLITSKI KRNJEVAL
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13. svibanj 2024 12:28