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[title] => Kako izbjeći plaćanje poreza na nekretnine? Bloger Krule objasnit će vam u osam točaka i nasmijati vas do suza
[alias] => kako-izbjeci-placanje-poreza-na-nekretnine-bloger-krule-objasnit-ce-vam-u-osam-tocaka-i-nasmijati-vas-do-suza
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Većinu Hrvata zadnjih dana muči problem oko plaćanja poreza na nekretnine. Po dobrom starom običaju, mnogi se pitaju kako 'škivati' plaćanje, a teorije o tome kako preveslati državu samo se gomilaju.
Bloger Krule na svojoj popularnoj facebook stranici pod nazivom "Obrana i zaštita od gluposti" uputit će vas u sve tajne neplaćanja poreza. Njegov status u osam točaka nasmijao je mnoge do suza, ali neki su sigurno dobili i pokoju ideju. Očajnička vremena traže i očajničke mjere, pa evo...
"U 8 točaka, kako izbjeći plaćanje poreza na nekretnine:
1. Prepišite kuću na najmaloljetnije dijete. Kad prepišete, djeteta se sudski odreknite. Maloljetnici ne mogu plaćati porez.
2. Na ulazna vrata kuće okačite sliku Miki Mausa sa aureolom iznad glave. Kuću u općini prijavite kao vjerski objekt i osnujte novu vjeru - Mikimauslavci. Vjerski objekti oslobođeni su plaćanja poreza. Najveći blagdan vaše vjere biti će dan Svetog Šilje.
3. Na kuću montirajte kotače. Kad dođu ovi iz općine zaduženi za porez, recite im da to nije nekretnima nego pokretnina. Kao dokaz, sjedite u kuhinju za volan, upalite kuću i odvezite ju 100 metara dalje.
4. Nek vam fasaderi naprave 3D fasadu sa motivima bukove šume. Kad općinski pukovnik izađe na teren, neće ju skužiti. Nema kuće.
5. Odite u katastar, nek vam daju točne granice parcele. Onda objavite rat Americi. Kad vam marinci upadnu u kuću, na balkonu izvjesite američku zastavu i bijele gaće sa smeđim uzorkom otraga, u znak kapitulacije. Hrvatski zakoni ne vrijede gdje su Amerikanci.
6. Srušite kuću i napravite iglu. Kad ovi dođu po porez, vi sa pingvinom na uzici izađite van i objasnite im da ste kao Eskim pošteđeni poreza. Pingvin nek cijelo vrijeme reži i trga srdelu.
7. Ogrnite se narančastom plahtom. Kad vam pozvone, otvorite vrata i objasnite im da ste vi Dalaj-Lama. Pričajte im o Tibetu. Kad je Dalaj Lama platio porez? - Nikad. Pa to vam govorim
8. Pitajte ih gdje su bili 91-e uz dodatak 'pička vam materina'.", piše poznata facebook ličnost
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Većinu Hrvata zadnjih dana muči problem oko plaćanja poreza na nekretnine. Po dobrom starom običaju, mnogi se pitaju kako 'škivati' plaćanje, a teorije o tome kako preveslati državu samo se gomilaju.
Bloger Krule na svojoj popularnoj facebook stranici pod nazivom "Obrana i zaštita od gluposti" uputit će vas u sve tajne neplaćanja poreza. Njegov status u osam točaka nasmijao je mnoge do suza, ali neki su sigurno dobili i pokoju ideju. Očajnička vremena traže i očajničke mjere, pa evo...
"U 8 točaka, kako izbjeći plaćanje poreza na nekretnine:
1. Prepišite kuću na najmaloljetnije dijete. Kad prepišete, djeteta se sudski odreknite. Maloljetnici ne mogu plaćati porez.
2. Na ulazna vrata kuće okačite sliku Miki Mausa sa aureolom iznad glave. Kuću u općini prijavite kao vjerski objekt i osnujte novu vjeru - Mikimauslavci. Vjerski objekti oslobođeni su plaćanja poreza. Najveći blagdan vaše vjere biti će dan Svetog Šilje.
3. Na kuću montirajte kotače. Kad dođu ovi iz općine zaduženi za porez, recite im da to nije nekretnima nego pokretnina. Kao dokaz, sjedite u kuhinju za volan, upalite kuću i odvezite ju 100 metara dalje.
4. Nek vam fasaderi naprave 3D fasadu sa motivima bukove šume. Kad općinski pukovnik izađe na teren, neće ju skužiti. Nema kuće.
5. Odite u katastar, nek vam daju točne granice parcele. Onda objavite rat Americi. Kad vam marinci upadnu u kuću, na balkonu izvjesite američku zastavu i bijele gaće sa smeđim uzorkom otraga, u znak kapitulacije. Hrvatski zakoni ne vrijede gdje su Amerikanci.
6. Srušite kuću i napravite iglu. Kad ovi dođu po porez, vi sa pingvinom na uzici izađite van i objasnite im da ste kao Eskim pošteđeni poreza. Pingvin nek cijelo vrijeme reži i trga srdelu.
7. Ogrnite se narančastom plahtom. Kad vam pozvone, otvorite vrata i objasnite im da ste vi Dalaj-Lama. Pričajte im o Tibetu. Kad je Dalaj Lama platio porez? - Nikad. Pa to vam govorim
8. Pitajte ih gdje su bili 91-e uz dodatak 'pička vam materina'.", piše poznata facebook ličnost
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21. svibanj 2024 11:15
